So your NFL team isn’t the Kansas City Chiefs and you’ve come here for some respite from the relentless war machine that is Patrick Mahomes.
Either that or your NFL team *is* the Kansas City Chiefs and you can’t let go of the idea of football now as your life is currently ongoing to the soundtrack of summer breeze across a meadow.
Well, either way – here’s a reality check: Pat Mahomes ain’t in the XFL, but you can bet your life almost everyone who was ever cut from the NFL probably is.
This is no top-table stuff, but it enough to whet an appetite on a given weekend. And if you can watch it, you can make it profitable.
Without further ado, here’s your team-by-team preview for the opening weekend of the (Vince McMahon’s overly deep, menacing signature vocal) XFL!
There’s no doubt in my mind that D.C Defenders have the best quarterback in this league and that should be enough, in and of itself, to give you a big opportunity to win the entire competition.
Cardale Jones, ex-Chargers quarterback, was a revelation at Ohio State, coming into a Championship game late in the season to catch the eye of the scouts onlooking. The NFL didn’t work out for him, but he’s a gifted athlete.
Backing him up is Tyree Jackson, who will undoubtedly be used in trick packages with Jones. Look out for their dynamic playcalling.
Outright: +600 with CanPlay
Apart from having the worst name in a league filled with bad names, Dallas also landed the least amount of high-ceiling NFL talent.
Yes, Landry Jones enjoyed a brief spell with the Steelers, but there’s little talent around him. Perhaps Cameron Artis-Payne – a standout at Auburn can be both his running back and top receiver, but they did spend the number four overall pick on a little-known wideout from Kentucky called Jeff Badet. Who knows?
Outright: +325 with CanPlay
The Houston Roughnecks ended up taking Phillip Walker from Temple as their starting quarterback, but Connor Cook, formerly of the Oakland Raiders, has got to be a better proposition than him for the franchise.
They can pair either up with Sammie Coates, though. I suspect he’s far too good for the XFL, or perhaps Ben Roethlisberger did his career a favour. It’s tough to tell.
Outright: +1100 with CanPlay
Los Angeles Wildcats
The wildest thing about these Wildcats is their selection at quarterback – Luis Perez, formerly of Texas A&M-Commerce. Yeah, I don’t know either.
In the supplemental draft, they did land Josh Johnson who is easily the most exciting of all the former quarterbacks in this league. ‘JJ’ balled out at San Diego and while his NFL career didn’t work out at all – granted he played for THIRTEEN different teams – he’s the kind of player who can combine unpredictability with experience.
Outright: +550 with CanPlay
New York Guardians
Everyone in the world should be rooting for Matt McGloin, and to be honest – he’ll have to do it himself too, as there’s a severe lack of standout talent around him in New York.
It’s almost as if they won’t be competing with the Giants, Jets or Bills anytime soon. Who’d have thought it?
They had the #3 overall pick and selected former Packers wideout DeAngelo Yancey. He’s not quick at 4.53 and he’s not big at sub-six-foot-two.
But he has ehh.. he’s got something?
Outright: +375 with CanPlay
Now here’s the team to watch.
Much like their city NFL counterparts, this team is focused on the run. Taking both Chargers standout Kenneth Farrow and Trey Williams with their first two picks, the Dragons are going to run some bizarre wildcat, especially as they’ll probably want to keep the ball out of Brandon Silvers’ hands.
You remember Brandon Silvers? Oh, you don’t? Same.
Outright: +1100 with CanPlay
St. Louis BattleHawks
Was there a need to capitalise the H, honestly? Or should I say ‘Honestly’?
Christine Michael was a baller in college but I’m not too sure his running style suits the XFL. Either way, he’s going to find out.
But one of the most interesting pickups is former Ole Miss QB Jordan Ta’amu. A couple of NFL scouts fell in love with him at his pro day but his skillset never quite translated to the majors.
Now is his chance at redemption.
Outright: +1000 with CanPlay
Tampa Bay Vipers
Aaron Murray leads the all-time SEC touchdown list for his efforts with Georgia, hence why nobody has given up on him just yet.
It’s just, well – they probably should. He had a spell in the AAF, and it didn’t work out too well for him. This may even be a step too far – and he’s got very little skill position help, seeing as Tampa Bay selected a tight end fifth overall.
Yep, you read that correctly.
Outright: +500 with CanPlay